Year 2006 has just begun, and this time, you are determined to stick to your New Year's resolution: to keep a diary. 'After all, why not?' you reason. 'All you need is a book and a pen, right?' One trip to the nearest stationery store and you're all set to begin your first entry. But wait! Before you uncap that pen and flip to a fresh page, here are some key rules to diary-keeping that must be observed at all times by any serious diarist.

RULE #1:  A diary is a collection of your personal feelings, thoughts and opinions. It is a place where you may boast or grouse as much as you like. You wouldn't want anyone getting their paws on your most private secrets, would you? Therefore, make sure you have a place where you can lock the diary up safely. Or write it in Swahili.

RULE #2:  Some time in the future, you will be taking out your diary and going through it again, fondly recalling memories of the yesteryear. You will not want to read about tedious details like, say, the weather, or the time of the day. Entries with passages like - "It is gloomy today. I can see dark clouds congregating in the sky. Perhaps it will rain tonight." should be avoided at all costs! In Malaysia, there are only two kinds of weather - sunny and pouring. Enough said.

(Ed. Note - Wait, what does that have to do the heck with anything?)

RULE #3: Be flexible about your writing periods. Never EVER purchase the kind of diary which have allotted spaces for every day of the week. It's not necessary to write for the sake of writing. If you do this, you are likely to end up with a logbook instead!

RULE #4: The most important rule of all! No matter how terribly dull or uninteresting you think your diary may be, NEVER THROW IT AWAY. Doing so would be a senseless act of self-immolation. After all, it will not be the quality of penmanship you seek when re-reading your diary in the years to come, but rather the essence of the treasured memory itself.

With these four golden rules firmly in hand, you are now ready to start painting a vivid portrait of your life with your mighty pen.

Happy writing!